The Little Builder

For grown-ups

What this story is about

Young children love to build, and they love to build fast. When it all falls down, it can feel like the end of the world. In this story, your child rushes the first bridge, watches it splash into the brook and wants to give up. Then a little digger's builder's rule helps: think about what went wrong, draw a plan, then build. When the new bridge wobbles, your child does not give up but thinks again. Making a plan and fixing mistakes are skills children can practise every day.

Three ways to talk about it

• Use the three words with any project: a block tower, a sandcastle, a birthday card. Think (what do we want to make?), draw (a quick sketch, scribbles count), build.
• When something goes wrong, ask "What happened? What could we try next?" before you fix it for your child.
• Praise the planning and the trying again, not only the finished result: "You kept going when it wobbled!"

Three questions to ask

• Why did the first plank fall into the brook?
• What did the child do when the new bridge wobbled?
• What would you like to build? What would you draw first?

Practise the tool together: Think. Draw. Build.

Teach the three words with three hand signs. Think: tap a finger gently on your temple. Draw: draw a little picture in the air. Build: stack one fist on top of the other. Try it with blocks or a cardboard box: think about what you want to make, draw a quick plan together, then build it. If it wobbles, go back to "Think" and look for the wobbly bit together.

If your child often gets so upset about mistakes that they give up or avoid trying new things, or if frustration regularly ends in long meltdowns, it is worth talking to your paediatrician or a child psychologist.